The Woes of Wyoming

Hard butter…I hate it.

Yet, I live in Wyoming. For those of you who do not know what this implies, let me put it in perspective. In the winter, it frequently gets into the single digits, and it also frequently gets into the negatives. I like winter, I like snow, but negative anything and life basically sucks. This morning my dog, who loves winter and snow, made it four steps out into the yard on our morning walk, promptly turned around, and went back through the dog door. He didn’t want to go for a walk and pee on sagebrush that bad, he’d had enough.

Well this evening, I had had enough as well. At 9:06 pm when I wanted a toasted English muffin with butter and honey, I want my butter to spread. Did it? No, because even though my butter was sitting out on the counter as usual, it was cold enough in our house that it was still as hard as if it had been in the fridge. Why is this a problem? Have you ever tried spreading hard butter? If you have, you will have discovered my problem. It does not spread. Nope, instead it rips huge chunks of English muffin from their rightful place and creates an unholy mess on the clean counter.

Now, I will admit, I ate the torn and tattered English muffin anyway. I glued it back together with honey and enjoyed every morsel. And the entire time I muttered about moving to somewhere warmer, like Hawaii or Texas or Florida because I really despise hard butter.

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