Hard To Love

She’d saved herself so many times
She didn’t know how to be saved
Didn’t know why someone would want to save her
She was a battle ship
Run aground
Punched full of holes
So many holes she didn’t know how
She kept them patched up
Sometimes she didn’t even
Know why she bothered

She had scars and demons and ghosts
Stitched throughout her body
Some haunted her nights
Some haunted her days
And others
Well others had simply been part of her for so long
She’d forgotten a time when she didn’t carry their burden

She didn’t have any trust left in her
No belief in fairy tales or happy ever after
Those who looked her in the eyes
Walked a wide birth
‘Cause there were monsters in those green depths
She had no qualms about what she’d been
Or who she still was
She was a believer in destiny
Despite its tendency to be a fickle bastard

She’d always been a warrior
It was bred into the bone and the blood
She was the keen edge of a well honed blade
Precise death delivered by red hair and porcelain skin
Covered with Irish freckles and tattoos from a dozen countries

In another world
In another age
She would have driven chariots of war
But she had no idea
It wasn’t that she was humble
It was more that the wolf had learned a long time ago
That she didn’t play well with sheep

She was a hard person to love
There was no give in her bones
No flex in her soul
She was a loner by necessity
Who didn’t share herself easily
Never forgot and rarely forgave
And changed moods with all the warning of a rattlesnake
She knew these things about herself
Had long ago accepted them

So she had no idea
Why he insisted that he loved
Had always loved her
In this life and before

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